Feb 14 • 04:15 UTC 🇰🇷 Korea Hankyoreh (KR)

"Am I a good person?" People who can't live without praise

The article discusses the psychological need for validation and praise among individuals, particularly in professional settings, using a narrative of an employee's reflection on his interactions with a supervisor.

The article opens with a quote highlighting the fleeting nature of satisfaction, particularly in relation to narcissism. It presents the story of an employee named Jihyo who, after presenting an advertising proposal to a new client, grapples with ambiguous feedback from his boss. The comment about the proposal being 'less than perfect' leaves Jihyo in a state of confusion, pondering if it means he fell short of expectations despite his confidence in the work he submitted. This situation illustrates the broader theme of how individuals often seek external validation to bolster their self-esteem.

Later on, Jihyo receives a more encouraging email from his boss, expressing appreciation for his hard work while suggesting revisions to streamline the proposal. This feedback provides temporary relief for Jihyo, who realizes that his sense of accomplishment is closely tied to acknowledgment from his superior. The article delves into Jihyo's internal struggle with needing praise as a measure of his personal worth, and this reliance on external validation makes him feel vulnerable and uncomfortable.

The narrative draws on the psychoanalytic concept of 'selfobject', which refers to individuals that play significant roles in supporting one's self-esteem and psychological functioning. For Jihyo, maintaining a good relationship with his boss hinges on receiving reassurance of his value, and this dependency raises questions about self-worth and the nature of professional relationships. The piece contemplates the implications of needing external validation in a work environment and the psychological complexity surrounding self-identity and self-esteem.

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